So, I spend a lot of time with my mom. Helps that we’re neighbors & ride to work together. But still, my mom is odd, & confusing. People from the outside instantly take it as “HOMG! Pixie! Your mom is SOOOOO COOL!” Yeah. Mmhmm.
She has her moments, I admit. Giving me a tarot deck for my sweet 16, finding cool shops while lost, etc.
Well, see, Mom has “The gift of gab”, as she puts it. She likes to write up funny family stories. I admit that they are very well written, & I think, if compiled into book form (like The Bloggess did), it would sell very well. There is just one drawback.
I’m in her family, therefore not imune to being written about. Think “Well, that’s cool, tho!”? Think again. How would you feel if your mother wrote an article, for example, about how you told her you were no longer a virgin? And then, in her way, hyper-exaggerated bits of it? Then, to top it off, post it on a then popular website, where classmates (cause you’re still in high school) have been known to look.
Still cool? Didn’t think so. Now, she didn’t name the child (I’m one of a lot), but she did give birth order. And, when you live in a small town, everyone knows if you’re the oldest, second, third, etc.
I still think she should do the book. Well, with a caveat. The kids talked about have the right to say “No, you can’t use that story” or “If you use it, you have to de-exaggerate it to how it actually happened, or no go”.
I think it’s fair. If it sells well, the stories will be EVERYWHERE, not just hidden away on a website in the far reaches of cyberspace.
Now, before people get in a huff about us wanting to censor our mother… the example I used? It happened. The story was printed out & passed around classes, etc. The subject about died of embarrassment, then called Mom, screaming “Oh my God, how the HELL could you do that to me? I didn’t say half that shit, and it’s being passed around. No, I don’t care how many hits you got, or that you’re paid ten cents per hit. Take. It. Down. Now.”
See our side, now?
But, I still want to eventually be able to hold up a New York Times bestseller, and go “My mom wrote this”. So, I’ll harp & nitpick until she gets a manuscript together. Until then, keep an eye on my twitter feed. I quote Mom a lot. A lot a lot. She’s funny.


So, my mom is big on family ties, and where we come from. She’s been researching her side of the family for years, trying to figure out who’s related to who, but mostly to figure out A) when we migrated from Europe to America & B) WTF happened to my great great grandparents, & why they sent their kids two states away to an orphanage after they divorced.
Me, I have it both easier & harder going for my dad’s side. Luckily for me, a cousin did a majority of the work about 6 years ago. What I’m doing now is plugging the info in from the emails forwarded to me into Ancestry.com, then go back & try to fill in the gaps, & verify the information is correct.
Seems easy, but it’s a pain. First, the site apparently is finicky, & likes to refresh while I’m inserting people. Then, you have to figure out if so & so is a boy or a girl. Like, I’ve a few Francis’s. Most are male, but a few aren’t. Then you get the oddball names, that don’t show up in modern baby name books, like Mahal. Also, in a far strung branch, I’ve apparently got a MALE cousin named, get this, Princess. Also factor in that my family settled in a pioneer state, and has so far married cousins back into the main line. Thank goodness, I’m not decended from them. But it gets twisty. I’m just happy it isn’t a wreath, versus a tree.
But I was silly. I work graveyard shift, so me sleeping in on the weekend is getting up  at 2am. I did. Then, about 5 I hopped on the web looking for free programs to make the tree making easy. No go. Win 7 doesn’t like them. So, I dug up the emails, made an Ancestry account, & went at it. Next thing I new, it was 7:30… pm. Shit.
I have to be ready between 10 & 10:30pm for work on Sunday nights. I lay down for a nap, but didn’t drift off til about 8:30. And then my alarm went off at 9:30. Yay. Joy of joys. If it weren’t for the fact that I wouldn’t get paid if I called off, I’d be at home, curled up & passed the fuck out, but… Money keeps a roof over my head, Mt Dew in my fridge, & kibble in Cricket’s dish. So I’ve a couple 5hr Energy Drinks in my purse, I’ve chugged a 20 oz Mt Dew, & am waiting to clock in.
All cause I got an itch to straighten my family tree.